PLAY: Abu Ghraib: The Untold Story
snippet: “There. This feels so liberating.”
time: 3:04; specs: 2.8 MB mp3
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Scoop! Who can turn the world on with her smile? Brace yourself, loyal listener, for the shocking answer lies just ahead.
At great personal risk, MVRT has recently obtained the tape the Liberal Media doesn’t want you to hear — the tape that proves once and for all that conditions inside the notorious Abu Ghraib “prison” weren’t exactly the “nightmare” Cronkite and his cronies would have you “believe.” And we have the proof!
Herewith, the shocking story behind the photos — a tale told by goof-offs, steeped in hi-jinks, packed with end-to-end madcap mayhem, and all recorded in front of a live studio audience.
Warning: Not really all that surprisingly, this segment is rated “Yikes.” And I think I speak for everyone when I say how very disappointed we are to find you still here, still reading this opening text, pondering whether or not to go ahead and play the file. Shame on you. Shame! (Note: This Creep-edy™ feature is rated “Yikes.”)
PLAY: The Birth of Cheese
snippet: “Eat it. You might like it.”
time: 2:20; specs: 2.2 MB mp3
script: Jolene Phelps; cast: Bill Cassel, Eric Stone; music: Cecil Vortex
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Two people. A mysterious substance. Tension so thick you could cut it with a piece of cheddar — a really sharp piece of cheddar. It all adds up to a hearty stew of fear, loathing, and dairy products called The Birth of Cheese, written by kabbalist glass-bender and underground phenomenon Jolene Phelps. Watch the skies, -CV.
PLAY: The World Is Loud
snippet: “Ask for Wally at Sleep Train.”
time: 1:09; specs: 1.11 MB mp3
written and performed by: Rodney K.
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Another entry, another category launch. This time out it’s “Poet Makes a House Call” — living poetry, read aloud by living poets, then broken into a million billion digital pieces and transmitted into your brain. Using electricity.
PMaHC is delighted to debut with The World Is Loud, by Rodney K. If the sleepy town of Monkey Vortex had a gun-toting sheriff-with-no-name, except he actually did have a name, but not a complete name, just a first name and an initial where a last name might otherwise be. And he wasn’t all that partial to firearms or even crime-stopping, but — and here’s the key point — if he was one hell of a rockin’ poet with the ability to rewire the cosmos using words. Well: that fella would be Rodney K. Enjoy! And watch the skies, -CV
PLAY: Billy Wildebeest in the Land of the Gigantic Duck People, Episode One
snippet: “Billy, the tribe is concerned about the way you’ve been…the way you’ve been acting lately.”
time: 2:10; specs: 2 MB mp3
PLAY: Billy Wildebeest in the Land of the Gigantic Duck People, Episode Two
snippet: “Ducklings come from eggs, you know that.”
time: 2:07; specs: 2 MB mp3
script/music episode one: Cecil Vortex; music episode two: Benson Hurst; cast: Bill Cassel, Benson Hurst, Tony Jonick, R. Stewart
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In this, the second ever official installment of Monkey Vortex Radio Theater, we take a thought-provoking journey to a heavily forested planet somewhere near the Outer Spokes of Coddington’s Nebula. Here we meet a young human named Billy, and Quala, an 8-foot tall duck warrior with a heart as big as all outdoors. Vortex on, -CV
PLAY: The New Sun
snippet: “Excuse me, ladies. Have you checked out the New Sun?”
time: 3:39; specs: 3.4 mb mp3
And as a special bonus for all you early adopters:
PLAY: Return to the Island of the New Sun
snippet: “There’s no point in running.”
time: 1:03; specs: 992K mp3
script/music: Cecil Vortex; cast: Bill Cassel, Eileen Dahl, EB, Kevin Hamric, Tony Jonick, K. Smith
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Welcome to the first ever official installment of Monkey Vortex Radio Theater, originally recorded way back in April of 2004. Those were heady times. Heady.
We launch with The New Sun, an example of an all-new, highly experimental genre we’ve been developing in an otherwise altogether unimpressive sector of our state-of-the-art, fusion-powered MVRT facilities.
We call this genre: “Creep-edy™.” One part comedy. One part just plain creepy. Enjoy! -CV
Thus it begins. Our great and glorious adventure. Right-clickest thou on yon link below. Savest thee thy file to thine drive. Play on. Play on! And in so playing, be-est thou exhalted, exported, and exhorted.
“We few, we proud, we….Monkey Vortex.”
PLAY
time: 24 seconds; specs: 390K mp3