Category Archives: Politics, Politics, Politics, Shtick

John, Paul, George, and Ringo

John, Paul, George, and Ringo
PLAY: John, Paul, George, and Ringo
snippet: “It’s these two guys. They wanna join the Beatles.”
time: 1:46; specs: 1.6 MB mp3
written by: Cecil Vortex; starring: John Kerry, George W. Bush, Benson Hurst, and Cecil Vortex
What if, hypothetically speaking, the two presidential candidates, by bizarre coincidence, bore the first names of the two Beatles who’ve left this mortal sphere? OK, now hold that thought. What if, once again, speaking entirely hypothetically, what if the two remaining Beatles were therefore obligated to consider the aforementioned presidential candidates for induction into the world’s greatest rock band?
What if? What if indeed. Enjoy, and watch the skies, -CV

Sympathy for the W.

Sympathy for the W
PLAY: Sympathy for the W.
snippet: “I feel real weird lately.”
time: 2:20; specs: 2.2 MB mp3
written by: Bill Cassel and Christian Crumlish; starring: Christian Crumlish, M. Smith, and Eileen Dahl
Make no mistake, you’re in Kerry country now. Still, us Democratic loyalist types are nothing if not powerfully attuned to the suffering of others. So, as the White House slowly starts to slip from out the dry-skinned, clammy-clawed grasp of the current administration, we ask: why not set aside two minutes and twenty seconds (remarkably enough — the approximate playing time of this very featurette!) to show a little compassion for a certain soon to be sullen conservative? That is to say, a little sympathy…for the W.? Enjoy, and watch the skies, -CV

You Be the Judge (Oh Yeah)

You Be the Judge (Oh Yeah)
PLAY: You Be the Judge (Oh Yeah)
time: 1:47; specs: 1.6 MB mp3
written and performed by: John Kerry, George Bush, and Bob Schieffer; music and editing: Cecil Vortex
In case you missed Wednesday night’s third and final Presidential debate, here’s a quick and dirty recap in one minute and change. Set to drum and keys, with accompanying horse clops. As the saying goes: it’s got a good beat. And you can dance to it. Watch the skies, -CV